Work at Table | Better Than Elephant Proctology

It’s that time of year. Table on Ten is hiring. Come join the family! We’re on the couch in y-fronts and a wife-beater, watching reruns of Steve Irwin, Crocodile Hunter, sucking on a quart of Wild Irish Rose. Throw your phone across the room, kick the cat, run upstairs, slam your bedroom door. We’ll send your little sister up and you can scream at her to ‘leave me alone you nasty little dwarf, I hate you!’. Come down after you’ve Facetimed Brianna for three hours, we’ll pick up Grandma and go to Taco Bell.


Sturdy upright citizens are needed to fill the blurry-edged roles of:

• front-of-house | wait staff

• kitchen staff

• dishwasher

We’re looking for reliable, self-motivated, hard-working team-players with energy, stamina and a desire to work in food and service.

You’ll need a flexible schedule, including weekends, evenings, holidays and (in some cases) weekdays.

You’ll have to be able to work well in a fast-paced, energetic environment; to multi-task, stay organized and motivated. And perhaps deal with the public.

Each job has different responsibilities and time commitments.

Starting immediately. Put some clothes on for heavens sake.


We think working at Table on Ten is pretty great. You could absolutely do worse.

Jobs that working at Table on Ten is better than include:

• toll booth attendant

• crime-scene cleaner

• pet food taster

• peep-show janitor

• embalmer

• panda inseminator

• discount colonoscopist

• upstate art gallery owner

• amputee pole-dancer

• anything in Buffalo


To find out more, write to us at