DIGNITY OF LABOR • SECRETS FROM THE TRAINING CAMP

Oiling up in the Catskills for the second annual Labor Day Sunday Evening Greco-Roman Smackdown, Team Bolinas decamped from Brooklyn to rustic Cherry Valley, facilitating a time-homoured slow-food training regime; extreme privacy, punctuated by forays at dawn through empty valleys for raw milk and poblano peppers. Why take two days to make dinner when you can idle away three weeks? Meeting Four and Twenty Blackbirds in Kingston for a dose of Grizzly Bear provides the perfect backdrop for discussing stone-fruit. And what better forum for a corn-on-the-cob symposium than an evening ushering in the Apocalypse at the Demolition Derby, embroidered by the massed flocks of downstate photographers getting their backwoods Joel Sternfeld on?

And as we lollop up the final furlong like a harras of sleepy unicorns, indulge us in sharing a few snaps, a gauzy commonplace of our Month in the Country.

Details of the dinner – which we’re eager for you be part of – will follow shortly. But in the meantime …

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nate Smith | Emily Elsen | Sophie Kamin | Inez Valk | Burning Down the House

English polemicist Hobbes,
Took to bigamy in between jobs,
“I’d do less perspiring
And much more inspiring
If I had me four balls and two knobs.”

We’ve reached that bloodshot, coke-addled point in the political polemic when the Carnival of Assholes has become functionally unbearable. Last night the hours between 2.30 and 4.15 were spent gazing at the ceiling like Munch’s The Scream, sleeplessly contemplating the horror of being governed by a giant, bloated incubus muppet: whatever happened to the old chestnuts of financial destitution, lovelessness, cancer, infant mortality and the bomb?

We all need a break.

Friday night we register our protest at #peakdrivel by running screaming from our houses in pantyhose and fishermen’s cable-knits, wrapping the entire interior of the Table on Ten in newspaper and inviting Nate Smith and Sophie Kamin (from Bar Bolinas and Allswell) and Emily Elsen (from Four and Twenty Blackbirds) to man the existential barricades alongside Inez in a steadfast one-night cookathon which will employ every last scrap of vegetation remaining in Delaware County. Star Route, Berry Brook, Burnetts and Hellers will be rendered desolate wastelands. Further supplies will be pillaged from Key Training Farm, Cowbella, Bovina Valley, Greenane and Marguerite, along with the rude knobbly bits from fridges, shelves, sides of the road, Ollie’s matted flanks and the trunk of the Subaru. Scorched earth harvesting. What’ll remain when we’re done is rocks, stumps and grubby-handled toddler’s pull-toys, each missing a wheel.

No tickets, no invitations, tastings or pairings. No french linen sheets repurposed as tablecloths or backwoods banjo-string-quartets. You don’t have to simper like a poodle or prance like a dressage-pony.

No need to hashtag, like, follow, lie, cheat, namaste or lol. Neither to choreograph kittens or petals, crush persimmons, nor scatter ground-cherries onto beds of milkweed fluff. Leave your prohibition-era assless chaps, pomade and rolled-up cap-sleeves at home, there’ll be no biblical ram-slaughter. Hell, you could even contrive to forget your iPhone.

Call us up to tell us you’re coming, then come. Or swing by. Like any other pizza night.

The only difference is the whole damn menu.

And no pizza.

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Chewin’ the Cud with Nate, Emily, Sophie and Inez

Friday 4th November, Table on Ten, 6 to 9

Menu will Quite Probably Include 

SOFT BOILED EGG –  $5
spruce aioli, garlic chives, tarragon

URSULA KALE AND APPLE SALAD – $12
Alderney cheese, armagnac prunes

WINTER CHOPPED SALAD – $10
beets, cabbage, celeriac, cumin koji maple dressing, cilantro, mint

CAST IRON SOURDOUGH WITH PRESERVED TOMATOES – $10

ROASTED VEGETABLES WITH RED MOLE (the sauce, not the insectivore) – $12
potatoes, cardoons, turnips

SPICED LENTILS AND NETTLES – $10
tomatoes, yogurt, mint

ROASTED BROCCOLI RABE – $12
almonds, Cotija

TAMARIND PORK – $18
Cortland onions, pickled peppers

SALTED CARAMEL APPLE MINI-PIES – $7
maple syrup, fresh frozen yogurt, bee pollen

•••

wine

beer

prayer

•••

bring your own children and cigarettes

Bearleader Chronicle | Issue 61

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On one of those those mornings when you got up at 5.30, set a fire in the grate, sat at the table and did two hours of planning and ordering, drove to Delhi, pushed a cart round the Chopper, shouldered 100 lbs of chicken feed, lingered by the slow pump at the Sunoco watching those Aadvantage points whittle crumbs off your life … all before an 8.30 start in Bloomville … it’s rewarding to open your computer and find somebody else’s take on what you’re doing. Thanks to Daniela at Bearleader Chronicle for this beautiful piece, the entirety of which can be found here.

Further Scenes From A Dinner

Equal with colleagues in a ring
I sit on each calm evening
Enchanted as the flowers
The opening light draws out of hiding
With all its gradual dove-like pleading,
Its logic and its powers:

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pamela_jack

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fish_pair

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All photographs: Gentl and Hyers

Scenes From A Dinner

Lucky, this point in time and space
Is chosen as my working-place,
Where the sexy airs of summer,
The bathing hours and the bare arms,
The leisured drives through a land of farms
Are good to a newcomer.

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All photographs: Gentl and Hyers

The PINES | Table on Ten | Four & Twenty Blackbirds | All-Pro Tag-Team Smackdown

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The PINES – featuring John ‘Boar Belly’ Poiarkoff – is coming back to Bloomville. They’ll pick up Four & Twenty Blackbirds’ own Black Bottom Emily Elsen along the way. Get ready for maitake mushroom piledrivers.

Supporting cast to follow. But for now, wrap your fist round a thick black Sharpie and vigorously scribble on your calendar, obliterating the date and the sheetrock behind it.  Might as well wipe out the morning after while your at it. It’s Labor Day Weekend so no need to go anywhere. Stay where you are. Have a bath. Do your nails.

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THE PINES and FOUR & TWENTY BLACKBIRDS at TABLE ON TEN

(featuring liquid support from ZEV ‘THE BEAST OF LANGUEDOC’ ROVINE)
 
SUNDAY 31st AUGUST

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8 ROUNDS OF MOUTHWATERING MUNCHING ACTION

$75

4 OPTIONAL ROUNDS OF EYE-POPPING SLURPING ACTION (+ SPECIAL GUEST APERITIVO)

$35

••

EVERYTHING EDIBLE SOURCED FROM WITHIN 25 MILES

Doors open at 7: Facebusters begin at 7.30

Grab a FOLDING METAL CHAIR and swing it at something.

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STRICTLY LIMITED SEATING – ONLINE TICKETS ONLY – INFO@TABLEONTEN.COM

••

BRROOOAAAAARRGH!

Osmos | Beer on Sunday | Bread on Monday

Osmos, Cay Sophie Rabinowitz, Torkil Stavdal, Justus Red Rye Ale and 44 individual Potted Ale Loaves by Table on Ten.

Confirming (once again) the Power of Love.

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The pots spell out the text of W.H. Auden’s Song of the Master and Boatswain. Or they nearly do. We ran out of pots and chalked the last line-and-a-half on Kraft paper.

At Dirty Dick’s and Sloppy Joe’s 
We drank our liquor straight, 
Some went upstairs with Margery, 
And some, alas, with Kate; 
And two by two like cat and mouse 
The homeless played at keeping house. 

There Wealthy Meg, the Sailor’s Friend, 
And Marion, cow-eyed, 
Opened their arms to me but I 
Refused to step inside; 
I was not looking for a cage 
In which to mope my old age. 

The nightingales are sobbing in 
The orchards of our mothers, 
And hearts that we broke long ago 
Have long been breaking others; 
Tears are round, the sea is deep: 
Roll them overboard and sleep.

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