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Sunday 23rd of October, 1 till 3 at Table on Ten
UPDATE ON LYME with MARGUERITE UHLMANN-BOWER
PREPARE FOR NEXT YEAR
HOW ABOUT THIS WINTER?
The following questions may or may not be addressed;
• what is it?
• why’s it here?
• as if I didn’t have enough to worry about?
• I feel like an over-caffeinated zombie, blundering through life embalmed in kleenex wearing oven-mitts. I can hardly form words. Have I got it?
• or is that just Delaware County on a Tuesday afternoon?
• if I’ve got it, what can I do about it?
• if I haven’t got it, what can I do to keep not having it?
• if I have a fear of not missing out, what can I do to get it?
• my dog looks like an over-caffeinated zombie and she’s wearing oven-mitts. Has she got it?
• same with my kids.
• does it look good on Instagram?
• was it dropped by the government to eat the flies that ate the tent caterpillars?
• what the fuck?
• is it just some upstate Brooklyn badge-of-honor thing, like looking maybe to build a cabin on some land?
• or burying a pig?
• if I found it crawling in my butt-crack, which friend would I call to come take it out?
• if I drink colloidal silver will I be able to join Blue Man Group?
• is it married?
• is it one of the 207 Greatest Insects in the World?
• is it allergic to cheap brandy in large quantities?
• can I use this as a defense against a DUI?
• can it be pickled to garnish a salad of shiso-fermented turnip greens?
• would it help if my pants were tighter? I’m not sure that’s possible, just asking.
• did the immigrants do it?
• I haven’t seen my genitals in half a decade, how am I supposed to spot a comma crawling across the folds of my back under six layers of Spanx?
• if we opened on a Sunday night, would it come and eat pizza?
• is this the first time it’s been kind of useful that I’m bald?
• will it make America great again?
• if I set up a long table in a field on an evening with candles and wine and crucified sheep, would everybody who attends get it?
• there’s an insect in Africa whose life-cycle involves burrowing into the eyes of children and blinding them by eating its way out. Explain this in terms of a benign, omniscient God.
• is it allergic to pomade?
• did you just fart?
• Jesus, at the dinner table?