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It’s that time of year. Table on Ten is hiring. Come join the family! We’re on the couch in y-fronts and a wife-beater, watching reruns of Steve Irwin, Crocodile Hunter, sucking on a quart of Wild Irish Rose. Throw your phone across the room, kick the cat, run upstairs, slam your bedroom door. We’ll send your little sister up and you can scream at her to ‘leave me alone you nasty little dwarf, I hate you!’. Come down after you’ve Facetimed Brianna for three hours, we’ll pick up Grandma and go to Taco Bell.
Sturdy upright citizens are needed to fill the blurry-edged roles of:
• front-of-house | wait staff
• kitchen staff
We’re looking for reliable, self-motivated, hard-working team-players with energy, stamina and a desire to work in food and service.
You’ll need a flexible schedule, including weekends, evenings, holidays and (in some cases) weekdays.
You’ll have to be able to work well in a fast-paced, energetic environment; to multi-task, stay organized and motivated. And perhaps deal with the public.
Each job has different responsibilities and time commitments.
Starting immediately. Put some clothes on for heavens sake.
We think working at Table on Ten is pretty great. You could absolutely do worse.
Jobs that working at Table on Ten is better than include:
• toll booth attendant
• crime-scene cleaner
• pet food taster
• peep-show janitor
• panda inseminator
• discount colonoscopist
• upstate art gallery owner
• amputee pole-dancer
• anything in Buffalo
To find out more, write to us at email@example.com
Let it never be said Table on Ten is just about stuffing your face.
We’ve been nicely stuffing your ears with John Houshmand for quite some time. Stuffing your eyes with classic movies on the stone wall on pizza nights. We’ve stuffed your noses with chicken leek and bacon pot pies and trays of freshly-baked granola. Your hands with custom plastic fly-swatters.
Now we’re going to stuff your minds.
WEEDEATER • A Film by Eden Batki + Marty Windahl + Amy von Harrington
FORAGING THROUGH THE AMAZING WORLD OF NANCE KLEHM
Sunday 10th July at 1 pm | Table on Ten | $5
Now bear in mind, we know a thing or two about foraging. We’ve been out in the backyard with Marguerite Uhlmann-Bower more than once. Remember nettle balls? What about spruce tip soda? Ollie the Dog can spend hours chewing on a locally foraged piece of gravel. And one or other of us can frequently be found foraging a pack of Camel Lights and $1 lighter at the Mirabito in Hobart.
But we are minnows compared to Nance Klehm. Nance is a foraging tuna. She’s more than that. She’s …
… a self-described ‘steward of the earth’. She is an ecological systems designer, a permacultural grower, a horticultural consultant and a talented and much sought after teacher and speaker. She is respected internationally for her work on land politics and growing for fertility. Meeting her for the first time feels as though you are catching her mid-sentence and mid-stride.
Weedeater trots alongside Nance through various landscapes, gathering together a collection of her thoughts and philosophies on everything from wild, uncultivated weeds to human waste composting to ‘the dark cosmos’ soil. An accurate portrait of Klehm would be impossible to confine to a formal or traditional documentary narrative. Instead, Weedeater attempts to sketch Klehm’s character as well as reflect the depth and complexity of her intimate relationship with the earth and all its inhabitants, in the unique and intimate structure and style of this experimental film.
Like we said, Sunday 10th July at 1 pm | Table on Ten | $5
Come by bike. Come by Car. Come by Astral Projection. Have a bite of lunch, a glass of wine. Do the things you can’t usually do in a movie-theatre (within reason).
Filmmaker Eden Batki will be with us, so we’ll have lots of questions and – for once – somebody armed with answers.
Please come. You can let us know by email or on 607-643 6509
Or just turn up. We’d love to see you.
July 7, 2016. Posted in Events, Inspirers, Underpants. Tags: Amy von Harrington, Eden Batki, John Houshmand, Marguerite Uhlmann-Bower, Marty Windahl, Mirabito, Nance Klehm, Nettle Soup, Ollie the Dog, Spruce Tip Soda, Tuna, Weedeater.
We have The Four & Twenty Blackbirds Pie Book
Yeah, I mean, it’s July 4th for God’s sake. It took you 7 hours to get to Yonkers. The dog had gas. You’re grinding Xanax into Montepulciano, slugging it down in quart jars and snorting the residue. You just made a pass at the lawnmower man in your underwear and he ran off into the knotweed. You’ve locked the kids in an old laundry hamper in the basement and can no longer hear their screams.
Now you’re going to make pie crust?
Spare yourself a lifetime in Attica. We have whole Four & Twenty Blackbirds pies.
Flavors as follows, while stocks last:
• Strawberry Kaffir Lime
• Black-Bottom Spruce
• Salted Caramel Apple
• Matcha Custard
• Strawberry Streusel
• Rhubarb Crumble
$35 for a whole pie. Big enough to feed one fat family of eight or two skinny ones.
Give us a call on 607-643 6509, or email us here
July 2, 2016. Posted in Recipes, The Menu, The Microshop. Tags: Attica Prison, Black Bottom Spruce Pie, Four & Twenty Blackbirds, Matcha Custard Pie, Rhubarb Crumble, Salted Caramel Apple Pie, Strawberry Kaffir Lime Pie, Strawberry Streusel Pie, Xanax Montepulciano Cocktail.
‘The British are going! The British are going!”
Welcome to Independence Day weekend. The one where we celebrate severing ties with a tiny, obscure island off the coast of Europe, known for warm beer, pre-masticated peas and blaming other people for their problems. Being something of a tiny landlocked island ourselves – Delaware County – we thought we could perhaps garner a spot of lost wisdom from our plucky ancestors over the sea: their rabid adherence to cultural homogeneity, quaint policeman’s costumes, groups of men in ladies’ clothes dancing around poles with sticks in their hands and bells on their feet. Their dogged resolve in the face of dentistry. But most importantly; their prodigious capacity for moaning.
To that end, we will be setting up Table on Ten noticeboards, each with a single word at the top:
In a basket underneath will be a selection of commonly-used suffixes, which participants will be encouraged to place underneath to form a familiar British phrase.
ENGLAND FOOTBALL TEAM
COST OF A PINT
COST OF CIGARETTES
Participants will be asked to read their phrase out loud, to be repeated by the congregation. Once all initial phrases are exhausted, we will ask for contributions; thus facilitating a hands-on, Internationalist, cross-platform, multi-media, son et lumière, interactive experience, rivaling Mount Tremper’s World’s Largest Kaleidoscope. And a brief insight on how grim it can be to be British.
To afford maximum participation in this rich cultural exchange, Table on Ten will be extending its weekend opening hours to include:
ADDITIONAL PIZZA NIGHT ON SUNDAY 3rd and ADDITIONAL BREAKFAST AND LUNCH ON MONDAY 4th
So to be clear:
Thursday 30th – 9 to 3
Friday 1st – 9 to 3 then 6 to 9 (Pizza Night I)
Saturday 2nd – 9 to 3 then 6 to 9 (Pizza Night II)
Sunday 3rd – 9 to 3 then 6 to 9 (Pizza Night III)
Monday 4th – 9 to 3
Hope to see you here. Toodle-bloody-pip.